Yep, all about me me me
And in this way, it’s a good thing. While I’ve been knitting, I’ve been thinking. Knitting and thinking go well together. And I’m getting closer to having my core desired feelings identified.
This comes primarily from a desire to feel light in spirit and body. In so many ways, I squash my inner light and in doing so, I squash me. I know it’s a form of punishment and I don’t need to be punished. I want to laugh, have fun and enjoy life as much as possible.
The best way to describe content for me is that feeling – however fleeting it is – you get when all the chores in the house are done and you have a moment to just sit and bask in the peacefulness of it all. Nothing’s nagging at you to get back to work on something. I want to feel that way as much as possible.
This is critical for me right now. And I’ve realized, it’s not just about feeling connected at work or making new friends – that’s important but not everything. I also need to feel connected with myself and the earth.
Some quick thoughts – not listed in any particular order. Zazzy- thanks for this idea. Some of these thoughts may make into a full blown blog entry later
– I got suckered (hook line and sinker anyone?) into springing for the Dressing Your Truth program – at the reduced rate. I did learn a little bit but not all the rules are appropriate for me. More on this later.
– DH and I are on different planes and it’s causing stress.
– My elderly parents are OK – without electricity, but OK
– Middle -age sucks
– I’m slowly sinking into depression and I can’t seem to yank myself back, which I normally can do.
– I desperately need to do something fun – I’ve forgotten what fun is
– The knitting project has gone very well but it is causing a rift between DH and me. It most likely won’t be finished in time, but it is quite lovely
… we (make that the royal we since I really mean I) will return to our regularly scheduled program on oh, about 2 weeks or so. I’m knitting a birthday present with a looming deadline. Every spare moment shall be spent knitting. I can tell you – I love the yarn, I love the pattern and I’m really enjoying the process.